


The Bones of You

by firetoflame



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Brothers, Coming of Age, Family Feels, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-03-30 20:17:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19034899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firetoflame/pseuds/firetoflame
Summary: Johnny turns to see Moses marching over. Moses who’s far too much like Ma to ever be contained.And just like with Ma, the world stops spinning to take in the sight of that much power.“Moz, leave it,” Johnny whispers as he blows by him.But Moses curls his hand into a fist and there’s nothing Johnny can do except close his eyes and cover his head.





	The Bones of You

Johnny is nine when he first realizes that Moses isn’t his brother. Not by blood anyway.

He’s never thought about it much, until he does, because for as long as he can remember, he’s been a Dingle. He’s always sat next to Moses during lessons. They swap snacks during lunch, making trades for the grapes Mum packs and gobbling down the cookies that Ma’s stuffed in secretly.

They get called together during attendance.

They even sometimes accidentally swap trainers if they’re not paying attention because Dingle is written in tiny letters on the backs of both the soles.

But when Tyler Blackstock pulls on the zipper of Johnny’s bookbag and shoves him hard into the wall during break, he whispers in his ear that he’s not really a Dingle.

Just a loser who has two mums instead of a dad.

Johnny rights his bookbag and massages his shoulder all the way to class. He slumps down in his chair and huffs. When Moses prods him with his pencil, Johnny looks up.

Moses’ grin fades, covering the hole where he’s lost another tooth. “What’s wrong?”

Johnny shrugs. “Nothin’”

“Looks like somethin’ to me. Hey—” Moses whispers as the teacher calls the class to attention.

Johnny drags out his green notebook and begins writing the date across the top. He doesn’t have nice writing like his Mum does. It’s all tilty and scratchy, kinda like Ma’s, but without all the added loops and curls.

Johnny wonders if maybe it looks like his dad’s.

He wonders if Moses’ writing looks like Ross’.

Sighing, Johnny leans his head on his hand, ignoring Moses when he tries to get his attention by making funny faces.

“Mr. Dingle!” the teacher barks.

They both look up. It’s automatic.

“Don’t make me have to separate you!” she warns.

“Sorry, Miss,” Moses answers. He ducks his head and shoots Johnny a grin. This time Johnny smiles back.

What does Tyler Blackstock know anyway?

* 

By lunch, Johnny is feeling almost like himself. Not quite right all the way down to his bones—there are still parts of him soaked in sadness—but it’s easier to forget the longer the day goes on.

“Here,” Moses whispers to him, sharing another one of those grins that get them into trouble. “You can have mine.” He slides his cookie across the table towards Johnny.

It’s chocolate chip oatmeal—Moses’ favourite.

Johnny nibbles on the corner, watching as Moses jumps into an elaborate charade for some of their friends. He’s crawling all over the bench, knocking his tray about the table.

Johnny collects it as well as his and takes them to the rubbish bins across the room. When he reaches the recycling stand, he knocks his juice bottle inside.

A shadow crosses behind him and Johnny steps out of the way to make room, but a hand lands on his shoulder and he winces, turning on his heel.

“Hey there, Dingle. Finished with your tray?”

Johnny glances from Tyler to the kids flanking his sides. They’re not in his class with Tyler, but he recognizes them still.

Johnny moves to step past them, but Tyler steps in his way.

“S’cuse me,” Johnny says.

Tyler laughs. “Your Mums teach you manners like that?”

Johnny feels his heart thud in his chest. He hates when people talk about his Mum and his Ma. Ma says not to worry about it. That there are people in the world who can’t understand different and that Johnny shouldn’t want to be around them anyway. Just leave it, she says, and that means a lot because of the two of them, Ma’s the one to always call people out.

She says she has a big gob and that she doesn’t want Johnny to be like that. She says he can be better than her. He wants them both to be—him and Moses. So she tells him to just let it go. To leave these little moments with the bullies who are too thick to reason with.

But it still rattles something inside him. Something that pulls his muscles tight against his bones, making him feel hollow and heavy all at once.

Johnny curls his fingers about the trays and shoulders by Tyler. But he’s not as tall or as wide, and Johnny loses his balance when Tyler shoves him back.

Before Johnny’s got his footing, Tyler’s hand shoots out and smacks the tray out of his hands. The garbage tumbles to the floor, milk splashed down the front of his trousers, soaking down through his socks and into his shoes.

“What’d you do that for?”

Johnny turns to see Moses marching over. Moses who’s far too much like Ma to ever be contained. He wears all his emotion on his face, his eyes expressive, his brows drawn down to frame his anger. It flashes all about him, like a wild energy. Johnny swears he can feel it lift the hairs on his arm.

And just like with Ma, the world stops spinning to take in the sight of that much power.

“Moz, leave it,” Johnny whispers as he blows by him.

But Moses curls his hand into a fist and there’s nothing Johnny can do except close his eyes and cover his head.

*

Moses and Johnny sit on the bench outside the head teacher’s office.

There’s barely a space to breathe between them.

“He’s right though, innit he?” Johnny says quietly.

Moses slumps back against the wall, scuffing his feet on the floor. “What’re you talking about?”

“I’m not a Dingle. Wasn’t born one, anyway. Mum just married Ma and my name got changed.”

“So?” Moses says. “Everybody’s someone else till they’re married or born or adopted or divorced. What’s it matter?”

“But he’s right. I’m not your brother. Not really.”

Moses frowns. “Don’t be daft. You’re my brother.”

Not by blood, Johnny thinks. And that thought bothers him more than he’ll ever admit. He doesn’t know who his blood belongs to. Not really. Who is Kirin anyway and why didn’t he want to stick around for him?

*

When Ma shows up, she carries the car keys in her hand, dressed in a work outfit—fancy slacks and a nice top. Her hair’s even done which tells Johnny that they pulled her away from the pub. Probably cause Mum was out on a call.

She raises a pointed brow at them both and that look alone speaks volumes. There’s an entire silent language that Ma’s perfected over the years.

Johnny slides down his chair a bit, but Moses glares from her to the head teacher and crosses his arms.

He’s always taking the brunt of the heat when they get into trouble. Even now it’s no different. The thing is, Moses doesn’t like to back down from anything, especially when he knows they’ve done nothing wrong. He’s the kind of person that will grow up to right the wrongs of the world on sheer will power alone.

Johnny’s sort of in awe of him a lot.

He probably shouldn’t have punched Tyler though. That was sort of wrong in a practical kind of way.

But Johnny’s not about to snitch on his brother, so he stares at the floor when they’re questioned.

Tyler’s Mum comes to collect him from the school nurse and there’s a moment when they all pass in the hall. Tyler looks between them, from Johnny, with his eyes wide, to Moses, with both fists still curled.

Ma puts a hand on both their shoulders. It’s not there to squeeze, but more of a support, and Johnny leans into her a little.

Tyler’s Mum has a look about her that makes Johnny nervous. The kind of look that Kim Tate always seems to wear—one that makes you wonder if trouble is brewing behind her eyes.

But not many people are a match for Ma and when their eyes connect, mother to mother, Johnny watches Mrs. Blackstock back down, taking her son by the arm and leading him from the school.

Johnny doesn’t know why, but he starts to cry, the tears creeping up on him. He swipes his arm across his face, drying his eyes.

Moses throws an arm over his shoulders and together they head to the parking lot.

The click of Mum’s heels echoes behind them, but no one says anything.

There’s nothing much to say, he supposes. 

Not right now at least.

**Author's Note:**

> I literally have no idea what this is yet . . . That is all.


End file.
